In the dynamic realm of work relationships, there is one element stronger than any title or wealth – gratitude. No matter our role or achievements, a moment of genuine thanks is beyond valuable. In this 11th part of the Successful Workplace Communication Series, we investigate the profound impact of simple thankfulness, authentic acknowledgment, and why insisting on winning debates can do more harm than good.
Gratitude as a Cornerstone of Professional Relationships:
Offering thanks might seem like a small gesture, yet it leads to big changes at work. It's a sign of respect and recognition for the efforts others put forth. Gratitude spreads a positive vibe and tells people that their hard work is seen and celebrated.
Imagine a teammate who works late hours to meet a deadline. A quick "Thanks for your hard work" is nice, but deeper appreciation makes a stronger impact. Try saying, "Your hard work helped us meet our deadline, and I'm truly thankful for your dedication to excellence." This doesn't just thank the person; it shows you see their hard work and care about it.
Practicing gratitude does more than improve the moment. It builds a culture where appreciation is common, boosting morale and growth. Multiple studies support the notion that a workplace environment rich in expressed gratitude significantly contributes to improved mental health for all individuals involved (1)(2).
Receiving Gratitude with Grace: The Other Side of Appreciation:
It's just as important to accept thanks graciously as it is to give it. We often dismiss our own hard work with a response like "It was nothing" or "Anyone could have done it" when praised. But this approach not only downplays our efforts, it can also prevent others from fully expressing their thanks and may even appear as false modesty or imply that their appreciation is misplaced, as in saying "You're being too kind, it wasn’t that big of a deal" or "I really didn't do much."
It's nice to be humble, but we should also see the worth in our work. Sincerely accepting gratitude makes the person offering it feel heard and appreciated. A simple response like "Thank you, I'm glad I could help" or "Your kind words mean a lot; it was a team success" works well.
Acknowledging thanks helps us respect our own efforts and builds a work culture where appreciation is a shared value. It starts a good cycle, making thankfulness a regular part of our work lives and strengthening ties among us.
Letting Go of the Need to Win in Debates:
Besides gratitude, one trait that can come out in work talks is the urge to win arguments. We all want to feel smart and have our views accepted. But this drive to always win doesn't lead to good teamwork.
I used to think losing a debate meant I was weak. I've realized that trying to show off my smarts isn't useful. It can push people away and stop us from working well together.
This need to win might come from playing sports, where there's always a winner and a loser. In human nature, when we feel challenged, instinct often gears us up for a fight, leading calm discussions to escalate into arguments.
Winning might feel good short-term, but it could hurt in the long run. The other person might just agree without really being convinced. Chris Voss, in his book "Never Split the Difference" describes a "You're right" as one of the least favorable responses you can receive during a conversation because it can really mean they just want to end the conversation (3).
We should focus on making conversations helpful, where all ideas are welcome and valued. That way, we can leave behind the idea of winners and losers and make a space where ideas grow from respect and real understanding.
Conclusion:
The act of giving and receiving thanks with true sincerity guides us toward a work life filled with kindness and satisfaction. It changes everyday exchanges into chances for real connections and shared achievements. By bringing this spirit into our workplace, we make a place full of mutual respect, cooperation, and emotional health.
Also, letting go of the need to always be the winner in discussions shifts our focus to what's truly vital: sharing thoughts to help everyone do better. Such communication is the heart of progress. Encouraging open talks that honor different opinions opens the door for new ideas, better understanding, and stronger work relationships.
Moving forward, we should keep these insights about gratitude and constructive discussions as key parts of how we interact. These practices enhance not only our professional relationships but also cast a positive influence on the broader spectrum of our lives. Every new day offers the possibility to engage in our professional endeavors with a spirit of thankfulness and a willingness to accept the unique insights of our peers, enriching our shared journey. This is the 11th article in my series on Successful Workplace Communication. You can access the previous articles by clicking the links below. Stay tuned for more insights and practical tips on improving workplace communication.
References:
Locklear, L. R., Taylor, S. G., & Ambrose, M. L. (2021). How a gratitude intervention influences workplace mistreatment: A multiple mediation model. Journal of Applied Psychology, 106(9), 1314–1331. https://doi.org/10.1037/apl0000825
Cortini M, Converso D, Galanti T, Di Fiore T, Di Domenico A, Fantinelli S. Gratitude at Work Works! A Mix-Method Study on Different Dimensions of Gratitude, Job Satisfaction, and Job Performance. Sustainability. 2019; 11(14):3902. https://doi.org/10.3390/su11143902
Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It
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